Nowadays, most normal people don’t want to fail. What will come to their head when they fail? “I should have done this rather than that”, “I could have done better”, and many other. After that moment, they will think, “What if I did the other way round?”, “What if I did action A or action B?”. It is good to introspect, but sometimes we need to be grateful of what we have, instead of what we don’t.
I’ll tell you my story. Two months ago, I competed in a Dota 2 LAN Tournament “AMD Arena” in Paris Van Java, Bandung. At first, I wanted to bring all my team roster to join that tournament. But, two of them couldn’t come because they were busy at that time. So, I only got two of our team roster (one resided in Bandung, one came from Jakarta). Let’s call them Y and Z, respectively. I couldn’t think of better person so we ended up asking one of our friends who knew how to play the game, let’s call this person… A. We had 4 persons already, but we needed one more. Our friend A got a friend, let’s call this person… B. At that time, we only had one week (more or less) to train before the tournament. But we couldn’t even train because B didn’t show up every time we wanted to do so. Finally, we completed our roster as 5 with the mid/carry player from A’s main team, let’s call this person… C. We met each other on Friday night, one day before the tournament. I didn’t even know C what he was like. So, I took that night as an opportunity to know his personality, skill, and behavior. Oh, and we were also joined by the manager of their main team, let’s call this person… D. We ended up staying overnight in A’s home after failing to find five spots in any internet cafes. When A, C, and Y were sleeping, B was like, spamming ranked MM while I was watching him. Z was still awoke because B was whining all the time about his stupid teammates and Y was snoring beside him. So I and Z ended up making instant noodles in the kitchen. I, B, and Z slept at like 4 or 5 AM o’clock or so.
We woke up around 7.30 AM and got free breakfast from A (well, that was really kind, I must admit). We should arrive at the venue on 1 PM o’clock, so we went from A’s home on 9.30 AM and began searching for internet cafe for a couple of games. Two games took like two hours and we were good to go. It was 12.00 PM o’clock. I was afraid that we wouldn’t make it because the traffic jam was really crazy. But at the end of the day, we reached it in time. Our first game, we played a common strategy. Tidehunter, Invoker, Troll, Sky, and Lion. We won teamfights after teamfights. We got an easy win. Since we registered for two slots, we played again that evening. This time, we played a pretty good team, so we kinda struggled. This is the Dotabuff match (http://www.dotabuff.com/matches/1282250152). I made some misplays, one that I will never forget was when I was 1v1ing Earthshaker with 10% HP and he with 40% HP. I was panicking and randomly hit Phase Shift button, so he just came and Enchant Totem-hit… and I was dead. But we won that game anyway after they threw on the Dire Jungle, near offlane hard camp. We were satisfied that evening and came to each other’s home to take a rest.
The next day, we were outclassed. The first game, we got no answer for Broodmother. The second game, it was my fault for being overconfident in Brewmaster when went up against Queen of Pain. I should have asked for Puck rather than Brew. So, we lost two slots within just two hours or less. We were disappointed of course, but it was a great journey anyway. I got two new friends, which then became a lot more. Not long after that day, I knew all of A’s main team roster, and we are still friends until now. Before the tournament, I only played during my team’s training schedule or when my college friends asked me to (it was usually non-ranked match since my MMR was far above). But now, I frequently play everyday with A and C. I often play with B too, but he prefers to queue solo MMR to reach 6k.
Back to what-if clause, I used to think “What if I win that tournament, I would have been famous and had something to be proud of”. But now, I think, “If I didn’t come to that tournament, I wouldn’t have had more friends, which is far more necessary ingredients to reach success.”
It’s all about point of views. If you succeed, be grateful. If you fail, introspect yourself, but instead of regretting for a long time, it’s better to be grateful of what you have already. I lost a tournament a week ago and cried, but after I thought about my chance in Joindota League Division 2, I realized that I should be grateful because I compete in Asia already. Asia.